Tuesday, May 22, 2012

My Own Voice

For those of you that followed me over from the Wren's Nest blog to here, you know that I generally write about happy, fun and beautiful things. With so much negative in the world, I feel like I need to put as much positive out there as I can. But the other day I was reading a post by a fellow blogger and something she said stuck in my head; "Write in your own voice".

I thought about this for a bit and then came to the realization that though I really do write in my own voice, what I don't do is write in my own voice on those days when construction jobs are slow to come in and there isn't enough paycheck to go around, or on days where I feel like everyone wants something from me that, at the moment, I can't deliver and to top it off, my dye job is a mess and my clothes don't fit. I tend to gloss over those days and follow the advice that my Mother gave me years ago. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."  So I wait until I have a project or a happy note to post about.

But then it occurred to me that by doing that I really don't allow my real voice to come through. No one lives a perfect life. We all have our off days and our struggles. The funny part is that we think we're all alone and no one else ever feels this way. Certainly not those perfect women that have those perfect blogs with the perfect children who do those perfect crafts. So NOT true...

So here it is, an off day in my real voice...

It seems that the last 6 months have been more struggle than not. I think a big part of it was too many life changes coming too fast combined with some seasonal blahs (one of the liabilities of living in the very rainy Northwest) and a 49th birthday. Also turns out that I am the queen of denial and had convinced myself that I had only put on a few pounds (try 50!) and that I LOVED working for someone else and not owning my own business ("It's just so freeing to not HAVE to be creative!!"). And I've been feeling a bit stuck. Nothing is flowing. Everything I want to do costs money and everything I need to do is free but no fun. So I'm crabby. And a bit negative.

But the point is, it's just an off day. We all have them. ALL of us. And it's ok. They pass. We get through them the best we can, and we go to bed and have faith that when we get up in the morning it's going to be a better day. And we take comfort in the fact that somewhere out there, there is someone just like us who is suffering through a bad dye job and tight clothes just like we are and we are not alone...

Wishing you more on days than off,
 

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